TODAY IS
So today was a good day. Everything is like plain vanilla ice cream. Normal..safe..but still tasty? Me and my food metaphors. I still feel down..I don’t think that it will change until I do; until I change myself, and it’s difficult. I feel so uneasy at times..why can’t I just be purely happy? To smile without dark things lingering at the back of my head. Anyway, enough of this..it’s a broken record, really. Today, Engjell came over and it was blissful as it always is. We fooled around and ate yummy food and I always love being with him..but later on, his dad called and he got into a huge fight with his parents. I felt kind of uncomfortable, but it happens. To make things more complicated, it’s partly my fault- his parents are concerned with him spending so much time at my house when they’ve never even met me. I’ve put off meeting them for so long that this happened, and I feel so stupid..so idiotic. I’m a fool. Always. I just want to do meaningless stuff like read books or some shit and forget how embarrassing and lame I am. Not much to say right now..but I know I’ll be back with better news. Good bye, diary; for now anyway.
